this my dream blog. if you want to see my politics, go to midnightmareoil.blogspot.com

an assortment of other work

Still getting many pieces photographed. Here are some so far on Photobucket, thanks to Chris.

http://s798.photobucket.com/albums/yy270/jvwilhelm/My%20Art/

teaching of the grandmothers-dream two

I walked a long path, not knowing where it would end but knowing I was going toward wisdom.  A beautiful woman dressed in skins or robes sat under low cliffs cooking on an open fire.  The ensuing watercolor speaks of the reason the woman was walking that path, her child was hurt.

Warrior

dreamer

no time for fear-dream one

I was sitting  in a living room, my loved ones on couches and though the window we were watching a nuclear bomb coming fast at us. I leaned far back, there was no time for fear, they did as well, and it passed right through the living room leaving us safe. The watercolor identifies the underlying attitude of fearlessness and immediate response.

eros

Alyssa loves me

Alyssa painted this just for me for Mother's Day 2010, because she knows me, and I am stilled and so grateful for this love and understanding.

blue

beginning blue woman and child


 all of a sudden I am working in deeper color.
I need to figure out the photography, this isn't a very good representation, but what I'm up to is painting unconditional love
which is my favorite subject, it seems...

Gaia

I painted this years ago, when I began to understand the absolute connection of everything.
Gaia represents the strong female spirit, and is the name of the oldest god known. (I don't generally use the word goddess for female gods, and I will be glad when it's gone the route of second class derivatives for women such as 'poetess'...arghh! )

The amazing scientist James Lovelock, who invented things for NASA as well as other scientific realms of discovery, has established what is known as "The Gaia Hypothesis" which, though first ridiculed by other scientists, has become of core relevance to mainstream emerging theory.  It says essentially that everything is connected, you, me, the air, the oceans, plants, animals and meteorites; everything molecule and chemical in the universe is  dependent and connected to everything else. It just makes perfect sense that everything be considered in the care of our planet Earth, and our ancient ancestors knew this fundamentally, long before the creation of a patriarchal hierarchy with its goal of power and control over all resources, which has led  to the absolute detriment of everyone but an elite few.  I can understand how the blind greed of individuals has come to pass in a nation bent on leaving compassion and cooperation behind and training children in abject competition for wealth, though we're been going the wrong way and I believe greed is at the core of world strife.  What I mostly don't understand is how those in power cannot see that their grandchildren also will not have clean air or water.

Give Me Thunderstorms.

                                                                     

      

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Watershed

                                                                  Pillars of Creation
                                                                         by Chris


 My son Chris and I showed paintings at a new gallery that opened last night, the Dana Marie Art Gallery in Corvallis Oregon.
It was a truly wonderful gathering of people and art, wine, cheese, laughter, networking, friends and family, strangers and new friends, all received with grace and appreciation by Dana Marie and her husband Emil.

Alyssa's family all came, my daughter and grandchildren came with two of their great friends, and as a bonus to the night, Cheyenne's art work, already well received by all, was a hit with the Dana Marie too. Maybe she'll be in the next one!
The day before, my doctor loved the almost finished painting 'woman child staff'  which she actually inspired me to do during a conversation after my surgery in the hospital.

I am feeling very good.

                                                                            Owls
                                                                      by Cheyenne

Aftermath

My polar bear dream of two nights ago keeps interjecting into my thoughts. Every once in a while, a dream is clearly teaching something, especially after two days. And they are rare so I pay attention.  It's called dream lag.
Waldport sinking in mud, so back up truck, notice polar bears, (which I think are beautiful and important and always to help save but wouldn't want to be close to one) lose truck, then plastic boat I don't know how to assemble, walk enter Seal Rock path between steep hills, rock formations- followed by 2? 3? polar bears. See people and safety at the ocean side but then see young bear in between. I look back and the big ones are coming toward me. Instantly adjust my self to pass the young one peacefully without fear. Cause there's no other choice.
Confidence.
Then I look up and past this possible one again and there are two or three more on the oceanside of safety, gathering toward me.
A lot of emotional searching going on in my life at this moment. I want to understand this dream, I want to understand the message, because I know the answer to my sadness and fears of the last few days is there.  
I'm not the only one who sometimes deeply connects to a dream, right, to what's just below consciousness .Even if they're kinda scary, so is waking life sometimes and this was one of those dreams that just won't let go. keeps entering my waking thoughts.
]

                                                                          Aftermath

On a vision quest in the mid 80s I learned to keep my feet on the the earth and stay connected: but still I like it that it's not yet dawn, and most of you are dreaming.

Grandparent

Dana gave me a great idea. Post a bit of story for the piece of work added.

'Grandparent'  is an acrylic fingerpainting, not formatted great for digital. Still learning. Folks seem to like this hanging around though.

Landing on my feet after the 90's, I'd  somehow gotten brave enough to take an art class at the Newport campus of Chemeketa. There was one art teacher there, and he was pretty amiable, creative and talented. He encouraged us in a bunch of directions. Painting with our fingers was one.
I remember feeling freed by this and contentedly used my fingers to copy a cherished old postcard that has resided on every fridge I have owned or rented since it came in snailmail back in the early 80's.
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A lot was going on in those years, you can imagine. Back when people got personal things in an actual mailbox fairly often. And I was curious and friendly, I knew a lot of people.  One day I got this postcard with this amazing face on it, and pure poetry on the back- beautiful calligraphy. 

The message is about being true to oneself and letting go and most importantly not being afraid of death.

I have my suspicions but I am not sure still who sent it, and I also am not sure if the wise person pictured is female or male, but it has long since ceased to matter. The older I get, the more it means to me.
A great thank you to You who took the time to send this to me.

work in progress

Here's how it went...I finally got the balls to have the damn creepy alleged dermoid (ew look it up)-but which instead actually turned out to merely be a fibroid-taken out surgically (but only because my kids really wanted me too) and out it went, along with that sadly overwhelmed ovary.
I don't really need either ovary anymore, so goodbye, but in truth even though I have accomplished the 'change' of menopause (what a dumb name, of course, most words for womens issues are steeped in patriarchal negatives...for instance, men who have an array of sexual partners are still studs, while we are whores, sluts, etc...) anyway I still kindof like that I have one ovary left. I liked my periods, I miss them. They made me feel like a woman. I know some of you have rough periods and awful stuff like endometriosis, and you wish your periods were over, and for you I wish they were too, but what all of a sudden pisses me off at this moment is that as common as endometrious is, and as hard to spell, when the red line appears under it, it has yet to make the roster of spellcheck. Unfuck you whoever is responsible)

Anyway my kids visited me in the hospital, and brought me many sweet things, one of which was a sketchbook of mine, just in case I would want to draw or something instead of gaze in unnatural contentment at the nice nurses or the tv in that sweet drugged stupor of pain meds.

And that's why I am painting this piece, 'woman child staff'. My excellent doctor, who was a lawyer first and has five kids, sat down for an hour, because she's cool, (and had to be in hospital cause a patient was in labor) and we got to know each other. She saw the original sketch of this, which I had drawn from a brochure I got in the mail, maybe from Oxfam or Heifer International, and said that a painting like this would be great for her office.
Maybe she'll buy it when it's done, maybe she won't. But she drew me into the next realm of knowing what I wanted to do with my art, and here it is, one message to my fellow human beings, not quite finished, but from my heart, and likely my ovary too.

Gaia

Finally.

Definitely a watershed day. Because of the amazing motivation of my son Chris, we are both showing paintings in a newly opening gallery in Corvallis. It feels like a beautiful new door appearing unexpectedly, and wide open. It feels like an important and illusive piece of the puzzle of my life finally found and put in place.

I am showing 'Aftermath' which goes well actually with his two pieces, 'Pillars of Creation' and ' Where Dreams Awake'. We share a sense of the mystical. Next, business cards.

Woman at the Well

2010. yesterday was a palindrome.

I want the lurking sadness to retreat to it's proper place...the shadows.

Life is a gift, always go toward the light.

acknowledge the shadows, paint them, write them, knit them, doctor them, enter their dreams and beginnings and sometimes their endings: never let them rule you.

I worked on a piece that I actually like, pencil and chalk, got into the zone. starting to do drafts on the wrong paper; knowing this of course means I am either out of balance or deconstructingthe ideas of others so i once again end up with my own... finally understanding that making drafts, playing, is ok after all. but most libras i've met are almost always weighing all available resources toward that delicate, perfect balance. and there is the rub.

when we are in balance, we enter those rare moments that at last make perfect sense.

and it's worth it. don't forget that everyone has every starsign i their charts, so most of you get this.